Bye, bye roboleg

Sunday was my last day with roboleg and I’m now back to wearing two shoes, not just the left one.
Feels great to be out of it but I think I’ll miss some of the attention I got in terms of strangers smiling to me, saying some encouraging words or simply starting talking to me, or seeing the look on people’s faces as they saw me cycling by, roboleg on.
But, it’s great to have it off. Summer has hit London this week and it’s above 20 degrees so roboleg would not have been comfortable to wear.
Think I’m doing good so far rehab wise, taking it easy with how much and how fast I walk so I’m optimistic that it’ll be ok. Not going to start my running (1 min, increasing to 2 mins, 3 mins etc) for another week or so but build up the time I walk and take it from there. Getting all so excited about soon being back to normal, being able to build up my form again. Love it.

I'm officially in the ING NY marathon!!!

Just paid the deposit to Health Unlimited so I'm officially going to NY to run the ING NY marathon on the 2nd of November! Wiiiiiiiiii!!! So excited! Love travels and love running so what better than a race that gives me an excuse to go to a city that I've been wanting to visit for ages!

'A total champ'

My colleague John wrote to me on facebook and told me that he'd just bought Nike+ and loves it! Reminded me that I still hadn't uploaded my latest runs. Once they were uploaded and I visited the my Nike+ site, I got this message:
Made me feel a little better but man I want to go for a run. I want to press that round button and hear 'beginning workout'.
Speaking of training. Tomorrow I'm going for a fast 2 min walk to see how my leg is handling that. Official start of slowly reaching my 20min fast walk goal in 2 weeks, after which I can start adding in a minute of jogging, and then increase to 2 min, 3 min, 4 min , 5 min... Joy!!!

Emotional day

Woke up at 7am this morning. It was a gorgeous morning, the sun was out, hardly any wind... Got ready and jumped on the tube about 7.50 to go down to Jess' for breakfast in Surrey keys. There were so many marathon runners on the tube and no surprise I got really emotional. Saw a girl that used to go to my gym and later turned out that she was running for HEART UK as well. She sat together with her friend and I really envied them, sitting there talking about the start, their worries... Opposite me sat a first time runner and a guy that had run a marathon before. Hearing the guy telling the first time runner what to expect... I really wish I was in their shoes and couldn't hold back the tears.
Started talking to a guy on the jubilee line and asked him if it was his first marathon, which it was. Once we started talking two other guys joined in the conversation and they asked about my leg. For a moment I felt like I was one of them, on my way to the start line. I got off the tube with a 'good luck and run for me as well'. I wonder how they did.

Had a really nice breakfast over at Jess' and then head up to Surrey Keys road where my charity HEART UK had their first cheering point. Carol was there and it was really nice to see a familiar face. Quiet a few HEART UK supporters turned up and we were in time to see the elite women, wheelchairs, elite men and the rest of the runners.

The sky literally opened up just before 11.30am and Jess and her flatmate Uma went back to theirs and I started heading up to Tower Hill for the biggest of HEART UK's cheering points. Couldn't find anyone I knew so slowly walked down towards Embankment. Stopped along the way where there was a hole in the crowd and watched the runners go by. Cheered on the girl from they gym, got emotional a few times but it was good to stand there and cheer on the runners.
Walked down to Embankment around 3.30pm and made my way up to Holiday Inn, Bloomsbury. Ran into one of the physio girls that was there at the get together. She told me to email her and she'll give me some tips on how to get back into running after my injury. Ran into Jeanie, one of the girls I've met twice before and spoken to quiet a bit. Was great to see her and hear that she completed it in around the time she was aiming for.
Were quiet a lot of supporters and runners there. Looked around to see if I could find someone else and when I couldn't I rang Jess and said that I was probably going to head home soon. Just felt really misplaced and it just made me sad that I wasn't there to share the joy and soar muscles. Despite the rain and hail today I really do wish I'd been running. I desperately wanted to be one of the runners getting on the tube this morning with a big expo bag, struggling with the tube stairs after the marathon. Instead I've been limping along on the side with my one redlaces running shoe, my running vest and my little HEART UK flag.

It's not really a surprise but unless my doctor strongly advices me against doing NY in November and London in the end of April, I'm going to pay my deposit on Wed and secure my place with Health unlimited.

Yuk!

This week is a week I've been looking forward to since November, only I don't anymore.
In 5 days I should have been running the marathon. By now I was supposed to be in the best form I've ever been, feeling great and being nervous and excited all at the same time, only I don't. In 2 days it's a month since I last went for a run and not being able to do proper cardio is driving me insane. My tummy hurts and no matter what I eat it gets upset. I'm feeling yuky, sleeping badly and got all this energy that I don't know what to do with. Feel like hyding away somewhere, alternatively crawl out of my own body. It's amazing how your craving for unhealthy foods goes up, almost exponentially to the amount of excercise you do, or rather don't do. I'm back drinking again, which is great but it's also made me realise how much better I felt when I wasn't drinking. Have to admit it's been a bit too much drinking lately so a middle way is propbably advisable...

I just got a leaflet promoting next years Flora London marathon registration, which opens on Sunday. Suppose the positive thing is that I already got a place so don't need to worry about that, but it's little comfort. It's over a year away and that's a very, very long time from now. I'm feeling really down about missing the marathon. I really wanted to be there at the start and finish on Sunday. Still haven't made up my mind about NY cause I'm worried I'll be taking on too much running two marathons in 5 months and to have to raise another £1000 on top of the other £850 that I still need to raise for HEART UK. Will speak to my doctor next Tuesday when I go back for what will hopefully be my last visit. No more aircast for me please.

Should I or should I not?!

Looks like I’ve got a place, if I want to, for the ING New York marathon. I’d really like to run it but getting a bit concerned that perhaps it’s pushing myself and my body too much to do two marathons within a year, more precisely New York on the 2nd of November this year and then the London one in April next year.

It’s (obviously) really hard work for the body and I guess I’m a bit concerned that my knees won’t be able to handle it. On the other hand I’d probably only run 4 times a week and focus more on building strength, which I can start with as soon as the air cast comes off. I don’t know… In a way I’m thinking that since I’m already in good running shape it’s not going to be so hard to train to the NY one if I keep up my current form (obviously not running the same long runs). I could then allow myself 1 ½ months break (i.e. less running but still keeping up the shape) between the NY marathon and before I need to start training for the London one and surely if I’ve just completed a marathon and been wise about the training volume my body should be used to it and it shouldn’t pose too much stress on it.

But, at the same time I think back on how tired I’ve been from the marathon training this year and wonder if it’d be too much, but then I think of that it was a bit different as I didn’t run more than 7k in one go before I started my training mid November, plus I missed a month due to illness. I guess my head is telling me that it should be fine, but then I get worried about my knees and causing them permanent damage… I don’t know. Would really like to run NY and London. So typical of me to get it in my head, be stubborn and then before I know it I’ve signed up. Going to think it through and speak to my doctor when I see him on Tuesday for my 2nd X-ray.

Maybe I can run NY instead?

Really struggling with the thought of not running a marathon this year. I’ve had my mind set on it for what feels like an eternity and I really want to do it.
Have run the same distance and more as a half marathon a number of times during my training so it’s not really a challenge. Of course I could challenge myself time wise, but I want to complete a marathon, this year, not wait a year.
Looked at the World Marathon Majors and NY is on the 2nd of November. That should be far enough away, time wise that is, for my leg to heal and it should give me lots of time for training. Spoke to Alex in work who’s run NY twice and London once and she said NY was better though hillier.
Will look into it tomorrow and see if I can get a place. Never been to NY and Dion and I have been talking about going there anyway this year so why not combine the fun :D
All of a sudden I feel a bit happier!

That's it for this year

My facebook newsfeed really sums it up...

Waiting for the MRI results

Just got back from having an MRI scan. Very noisy experience.
Managed to see the doctor last night (thank *** for private health care) and had an X-ray. Dr. James Youngman thought he could see a small stress fracture but wanted me to get a MRI to be sure. He advised me that until we got the result we should treat it as a fracture and asked the nurse to give me an air cast boot. Not knowing what it was (don't even know what they are called in Swedish as I've never had a fracture before) I was mildly shocked to see the size of it. More so when the nurse came in with a piece of paper for me to sign which basically said that if my insurance doesn't cover the air cast I need to pay for it myself, a mere £140. Spoke to AXA PPP and it turns out they don’t cover it. Having spent a fair bit of money on physio etc already I didn’t want to fork out the £140 unless I absolutely have to so we decided that I’d wait with the air cast until tomorrow (i.e. today) when I’ll have the MRI results.

Limped my way home only to find the latest Flora London marathon magazine waiting for me, including a new set of redlaces. Didn’t even open it. Think I’ve completely turned off my feelings for the marathon at the moment. I’m really started to have had enough. It’s bad enough that I probably wont’ be able to run, but having to walk around with a bloody moon boot on my leg and pay a stupid amount of money for it as well. I’m really not impressed. It’s not even good looking!!! Jess and Sabrina pointed out that if I do need to wear one I can use it to my benefit on the tube. Made me smile a bit, but then I start thinking about not being able to run the marathon, or run at all for x number of weeks… emptiness…

Well, perhaps the MRI comes back with a positive result! Perhaps it’s not so bad after all. 4 hours and 20 min until I get the results…

Can't believe it

As you know I've had a bit of problems with my right leg and lately it's been mostly around the shin area. Dion's been giving me massages but the pain hasn't really gone away. Went for a run on Thursday and it really hurt straight away in my right leg around the shin area, so much that I could hardly run on it. I really wanted to go for a run that day and took some of the pressure off by holding on to the handles while running at a really slow pace, but as soon as I let go the pain was there again. I stopped and stretched twice and was thinking that perhaps if the muscle just got a bit warmer it'd be ok. It got a little bit better but it still hurt but I pushed through (stupid I know). After 50min I gave up though. It was hurting too much and it felt really weak.

Yesterday I was talking to Dion, or actually complaining that my leg was so soar that I didn't think I'd be able to run on it all this weekend. Having a sports massage qualification he's been doing some tests on my leg and has pointed out that it doesn't seem like the muscles themselves are the problem but rather the bone. Since my calves muscles have been so soar I haven't even considered that it could be something with the bone, but after Dion suggested that I consult my running book it became obvious to me what it potentially could be. Found a diagnosis of something called a stress fracture, which I didn't even know existed. After having red about it in my book and googled it I started crying and I couldn't stop. I knew that the pain was rather serious and but I'd never crossed my mind that it could be so serious that it'd mean that I'd have to miss the marathon. Now that reality dawned on me.

After having calmed down a bit and stopped crying I started ringing different physios and got through to one in Kentish town called Sprint Physiotherapy. Spoke to one of the physios and after having asked me a bunch of questions he said that it didn't sound like it was a stress fracture but that he'd be able to see me tomorrow (i.e. today) to give me a proper assessment. Went down there today and quiet soon he said that it did actually look like I do have a stress fracture. My pain is in a very specific place and it's on the bone rather than on the soft tissues around the bone. He tried putting me on the treadmill before giving me a bit of massage and straight away the pain was there. I tried running again after a bit of massage and it felt a little bit better but the pain came on again pretty quickly and he told me to stop and that it wasn't a good sign. Walking back to his office I started crying. I can't believe that with 5 weeks to go it looks like I'm not going to be able to run.

Back in his office we did a few more tests, the same kind of bending and tensing tests that Dion has given me, and the pain wasn't worse but the same, which apparently was not the outcome we were looking for (had the pain been worse it would have indicated that it was the muscles and not the bone). So... right now it looks like I've got a small stress fracture or the beginning of one which means that I'll not be running the marathon but need to rest for up to 8 weeks. I'm going to get a bone scan to get it properly diagnosed and if I'm really lucky it turns out to be soft tissue related and then there are a number of things I can do to get me to the start and the finish line. But, it doesn't look likely and I'm really scared of getting my hopes up. I've really been looking forward to the day and my training has gone really well. I can't explain how gutted and absolutely empty I feel. Just can't believe it. Don't know how I'm going to cope with April 13th if I'm not going to be able to run (oh here we go again... crying, crying, crying). I'm so upset...

500km completed

After I pressed 'end workout' on my iPod nano today, Paula Radcliff's voice came on. As soon as I heard 'This is Paula Radcliff...' I started wondering what she would congratulate me for. My run had been rather slow (hill training) and only 45 min so could neither be my fastest km/mile or longest distance run. Turned out that since I got my Nike+ and iPod nano, and started my marathon training I've put a mere 500km (310.7 miles) behind me. That's almost the distance from my home town Lund to Stockholm. It's taken me nearly 44 hours to complete and has used almost 30.000 kcal at the same time. Impressive!

Now I want more. I know I'm a gadget freak but I absolutely love Nike+. It's such great motivation for keeping on going. Kind of makes you want to keep on going only to find out when the next congratulation will be. Also makes me want to log all my runs from now on until I can't run any more. Nerd, I know... but I wonder what the total distance will be?!

Feeling optimistic

Ran about 23km (14.3 miles) out in Skrylle in Sweden yesterday. Meant to run 18 miles but my knees and right leg weren’t too happy and considering my problems earlier on last week I didn’t want to push it. The pain was partly due to that I started out with the 10k route which turned out to be pretty hilly, which wasn’t at all to the liking of my knees. Not a good strategy either to start out that hard when you’ve got a wee bit longer to go so I’m definitely saving that one for last next time I’m home in Sweden. My leg muscles are actually soar today, something I haven’t experienced in months. Definitely the hills’ fault.

Very happy with my run though. Did the equivalent of half a marathon in less than two hours without feeling absolutely nackered afterwards so if only my knees and right leg can behave a bit better, I should be ok on the 13th April. Time went by so quickly yesterday that I was a bit unsure of if I’d actually had run the 23km and been out there for 2 hours, but looking at the watch and adding the routes up, plus checking my Nike+ assured me that I had. Amazing how a 2 hour run is starting to feel short.

Bruised...

Had to stop 20 min into my run this morning because my right leg was playing up. Really felt like I was getting a tear in my muscle so decided to see a physio asap. Went to the London Marathon website's injury clinic page where I found Physio Fit. Got an appointment with a therapist called Adrian Fletcher, really lovely and bubbly but boy was he hard in his sports massage. He kept on asking me questions whilst he was giving me the massage, but it hurt so bad that I could hardly talk.
Asking when I was planning on doing my next run (my answer was tomorrow) he kindly informed me that I'd probably be a bit too soar for that, plus that I should run in the pool until my leg gets better. Oh, and he also told me that I might actually be a bit bruised and yeppery bop, looking in the mirror when I got home there were some nice bruising on the back of my legs. But, my leg feel a bit better so fingers crossed that with the ordered stretching and lots of water (and running in the pool) I'll be as good as new soon. Really gutted that I can't go for a run tomorrow morning though...

Weee haa!!!

I had a fantastic run today! 2 1/2 hrs and close to 26.5km (16.5 miles)! That's the longest I've run, ever!!! Paula Radcliff's voice congratulated me again to my longest run so far (as she did last week). Nice!
Compared to last Sunday the run was so much better. I wasn't waiting for my Nike+ to count down the last 5 mins and my knees weren't dying for me to stop. Sure, they hurt but I ran most of it off-road and it really made a difference.

I'm so impressed that my legs kept pounding away non-stop for 2 1/2 hours today! I was saying to a friend yesterday that I've started looking at my legs more as... as a running partner when I run. I even started giving them little slaps of acknowledgment and encouragement, like you do to horses. Pretty strange...
Today I completely forgot about the little slaps. I'd loaded my iPod with lots of new music and after an hours run my endorphins were running high and I kept getting chills down my spine of pure happiness. I felt like jumping around and singing along out loud to the music, but a little too many people in the park plus I'd probably ended up injuring myself from the jumps. It was so great though. You can really tell that spring is around the corner. Ran in a singlet today, until it started raining a bit, and it wasn't cold at all. There were flower smells everywhere and all the daffodils were blooming. Lovely! More runs like the one today, please.

Fundraising struggles & great boyfriend

Told Dion yesterday that I was starting to get really worried about my fundraising and that I might have to donate a large part of it myself. Hate asking people for money, even if it’s for a good cause. Feel like I’ve been sending out so many emails/invitations etc that people must get really sick of me. At the same time I’m putting in a lot of hard work and yes I’m doing it partly because it’s a dream of mine to run the marathon, but a big part of why I’m doing it is also so to help HEART UK keep on doing a great job and save lives. I chose the charity because of what happened to Dion’s dad and I know there are a lot of people that can relate to having lost someone close to them due to heart disease/heart attack.

Got a long email from Dion today about how he’s been thinking of how we together could raise some money and it really touched me that he’s been spending time thinking about it. Then he pointed me to his facebook profile which made me just as happy.
I’m the first to admit that it’s hard doing this on my own. All the training makes me more tired (and emotional) than usual and worrying about not being able to raise enough… spins in my head. So thanks Dion for being so considerate and supportive and thanks to everyone who have already sponsored me and to those of you who will. It means the world to me and to the people that money will go to.

Hard run

Went for a 2hrs 15min run today through Hyde Park, Green park St James park, over westminister and all the way over to and around Battersea park and then up via Sloan square back into Hyde park and home. The run was a lot harder than the other weeks. Think I was wearing too many clothes and waited too long after breakfast so didn't feel that full of energy. Plus my knees were taking a toll as well. Was pretty painful towards the end and it got me really worried.
Starting to doubt that I'll be able to run it under 4 hours and I suppose is ok, I did after all miss a months training due to illness, but if me knees are hurting this much after about 23.5km, what are they going to feel like after 42km?!
Feeling a little bit down...and scared. Today's run wasn't fun after 1hrs 45min so I'm starting to get worried about how I'll feel during the actual run. I know there will be lots of supporters there, but still. Tiredness I can cope with but when I feel my body is giving in... that worries me.

Time to put ice on my knees and try to keep the pain away :(

My sports bra gives me bruise like things

A bit of a random post but… I ran 13km (just over 8 miles) this morning and noticed afterwards that I had a couple of centimetres long red line in the middle just underneath my breasts, right there where a normal bra joins in the front. Have gotten smaller red lines before, but today’s one isn’t that pretty. It doesn’t hurt or anything but it makes me wonder what I’m going to look like after 42km.

Getting closer

The countdown on the Flora London Marathon site says 1 month 26 days left. Can’t believe it’s so close!!! I’m starting to feel really nervous, super excited, a little bit scared but also a bit sad. Sad that it’s all going to be over soon. Sure, I feel a bit tired and it’s not always fun to put on the running shoes, but I’m really enjoying it all.
Met up with HEART UK at the Holiday Inn – Blomsbury on Monday. Some of the girls that I met at the training seminar was there and no matter how nerdy it sounds it’s great to be with them, talk about how the training is going, share your concerns and not the least get really excited about the day. I’m really going to miss it all when it’s over. Thinking about joining a running club to keep up my motivation and have other people to share it with.

Other than loving being part of the big buzz my training is going really well too and I love it!!! Can definitely feel that my shape has improved immensely since I started my marathon training in November. This morning I cycled into work, did pretty hard interval training for 30 min plus ran another 30min and I didn’t even feel tired afterwards.
This Saturday I’m having my last drink until after the marathon and it’s time to really get-serious and be good to my poor body that puts up with all the hard work. I’m doing 5 days of training this week and are going to keep it up until tapering time a couple of weeks before the big day. That combined with cycling 40 min back and forth to work 4 days a week, should hopefully improve my stamina even more and get me well prepared on the big day.

A little bit sad

It’s great, but it’s also a bit sad. As soon as I see someone being out running I really envy them and wish it was me. Today is an absolutely gorgeous day. The sun is shining, the air is really clear… Cycling to work this morning through Hyde Park all I could think of was that I wanted to go out for a long run. I kept looking over to the trail where I ran yesterday, thinking of how good it felt to be in that complete running mode where you don’t really have to do anything but your legs just keep moving by themselves. You hear your steady breathing, your feet touching the ground, the music in your ears, Nike+ giving me constant updates on my progress… I want to go out again, right now!!! Can’t wait for the mornings/evenings to become a little bit lighter so that I can start running into/back from work.
I think it's fair to say that I've gotten properly bitten by running and am starting to get addicted to it. Oh dear...

Just ran half a marathon and got my first blister

Today I went out for my second long run since after I've been ill. The weather wasn't as nice as last Sunday and a lot windier too but too my surprise I've realised that I actually like a bit of head wind. Probably pushed it a little bit running just over 2 hrs and 21 km (half a marathon - yaaaaay!!!) compared to last week when I ran 1hr 33 min and 16.3 km. I know it's the worse thing you can do but the excitement from yesterday really filled me up and my knees where fine for most of the way so I kept on going.
I took in what Sam Murphy said yesterday about not doing your long runs at a really slow pace but somewhat closer to the pace you expect to run the actual marathon. I didn't want to push it too much so ran at a really comfortable speed and only started getting a little bit tired during the last couple of kilometers. It was no way near the feeling I had after the half marathon I did in 2004, which must mean I'm a lot fitter today :) The thought of running the double distance in 10 weeks time is scary, but I'm running half a marathon at a easy, steady pace in two hours, without having to walk, so I'm sure I'll be able to do the double distance :)

Flora London Marathon Golden Bond training seminar

Today I went to the FLM training seminar for all of us guaranteed place runners. It was a really good event and I met my charity, HEART UK, and some of my teammates. Being there and hearing all the advices from amongst others David Bedford, Sam Murphy and Liz Yelling about nutrition, training, how to prepare for it etc, has completely sent my motivation level raising to the sky. They showed a video of what we can expect on the day and I nearly started crying. The feeling and the day itself will be amazing and since HEART UK are one of the two official sponsors of the marathon, we'll be a really big group so look out for the red vest and the red shoelaces :)

In a world that's so full of constant wars and battles it's great to see that the event has such a great support. Obviously we as runners are putting in a lot of effort but everyone who is sponsoring us... wow! The average amount that was raised per runner last year was around £3000 meaning that the average single donation from each person sponsoring is about £40! It's really amazing how generous people are and I'm so thankful for the people that have sponsored me already. I really didn't expect some of you to dig so deep.

I'm so excited at the moment I can hardly sit still. I'm really looking forward to my long run tomorrow and after having met the people from my charity, I've really realised what an amazing job they are doing and what a difference it makes. All that is needed to save lives is creating awareness and I'm so proud of running for them. I'm really going to do all I can to support the charity of the next few months and tomorrow my redlaces, which are a symbol of HEART UK, are going on my shoes.

Finally a fantastic run

Today I had my first really good run since mid December when I got the stupid colds that lasted til the new year, when I got a nasty chest infection. I started training again two weeks ago and even though I took it really easy to begin with, I've really been struggling to enjoy it and to find the motivation. I've lost a lot of the form I built up in November and December and it's just been so demotivating to do shorter and easier runs but feel more tired than on the longer or harder runs I did before. But, today the sun was shining and I went out for my first long run since before Xmas. It was really lovely and I absolutely enjoyed it. I feel like I'm getting my fighting spirit and motivation back and I'm really going to give it all I have now. Ran about 1h 35min so I'm not up to where I need to be yet, but I'll get there. I'm playing it safe for the moment, building it up. The last thing I need now is injury.

It went really well... then

I'm spending my third day in bed and I'm soooo bored. Started coming down with a cold a week before Xmas and it only left my poor body the day before NYE. Had 4 days of feeling ok, during which I went for a short run and then.... Then came the cough. Have now, excuse me for the expression, been coughing my lungs up for 3 days and my back and lungs are so sore from constant cough attacks. Keep taking cough medicine which makes me really drowsy so all I'm capable of is basically lying down and sleeping. Went to the doctor today and surprise, surprise, surprise it is a virus and nothing to be done. Should pass in a few days he says. Yay!

Starting to get really itchy feet from not having been for a long and proper run for over 3 weeks. Not the least cause I'm feeling time ticking away and I was really well on the way with my training, hitting about 20km on my long run. Hopefully some of the form I built up is still there when I start training again and hopefully I'm not going to be hit by yet another cold. Enough already!